Please stop asking me why.
I know, it is easier for those left behind to cling to why. Everyone wants a reason for tragic events.
You can trust us that no one wants an answer more than we do and we don’t have one so please stop asking why. Because “why” implies there was something we could have done. If we knew why then we can say, “oh next time I won’t eat green beans” or some other silly thing we can cling to with false hope. But ultimately there is no answer and there is no reason why. Something was wrong with the fetus. The body aborted it. End of story. End of our hopes and dreams for the third time. If you think that’s hard to understand, imagine being us. Or any couple that lost a baby too soon.
It is a statistical game and one that we are very bad at (or good, depending on how you look at the world). 1 in 6 couples have unexplained infertility. 20% of all pregnancies end in miscarriage. There was a 5% chance we would miscarry after the BFP following our IVF cycle. We had a 5% chance of miscarriage after seeing the heartbeat at 7 weeks.
Five F**king percent. We are very good at being that minority.
I wish there was a 5% chance of winning the lottery.